Angry with God

When death takes someone from us, we want answers. In the midst of our pain, we cry out. “Why…Why…?”

The questions are endless…the cries are desperate with pain…with loss…with anger. I look to heaven for answers…I shout to God that I am angry with Him…I ache…I plea…I cry from the emptiness inside. I look up…I shout…I scream…my legs give out…I fall to the ground…sobbing like a small child.

Exhausted, I fall silent; my tears are all I have left. In the silence, I mourn my loss. I have no answers to my questions. In the silence I feel helpless; forsaken; alone. I have no more strength for anger; no more fight within; no more questions…no answers. How much time has passed…minutes, hours, weeks, months…I cannot say…but this I know…

Finally, I have reached a place within…a place where I can accept…where I can say goodbye…where I can know that being angry with God was okay. I begin to realize that when I can no longer walk through this valley of pain and death, God carries me. I can now smile through my tears…as I remember.

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2 responses to “Angry with God

  1. Beautiful, Mrs Bonnie!

  2. And all of this takes place in a different time frame for all. It is okay to take as long as we need; there should never be a time limit on grief.

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